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The Terrible Incident

Author: Shannon Huffman, 03/05

I always heard tragic stories on the news, in magazines etc., but I never thought anything like that would happen to me. Now I realize that it can happen to anyone even if it is rare.

I met this guy in April of last year and I just thought he was wonderful. I knew that he was perfect guy for me. He was a skater and the skate park was close to my house so I’d always go up there and hang out with him. As summer went on we became really good friends. I liked him a lot and wanted to date him.

He called me one night and told me that he had been hearing people talk saying that I liked him and he told me he liked me too, but that he didn’t want a girlfriend right now. I told him that we could still be friends and that I would wait until he was ready. He didn’t call for about two weeks after that so I thought I had gotten blown off.

Then one night he called and told me that he had gotten back into drugs really bad and felt like this time it was so bad that he wasn’t going to make it. I was so worried he was going to end up dead and promised myself that I would help him no matter what. Every time him and his family fought or any problem at all arose he resorted to drugs.

Finally in September we began dating. He quit drugs and realized that he didn’t need them to be happy. We had the perfect relationship. We were one of those high school couples that everyone thought was so cute and we just knew that one day we’d get married. He would of given me the world if he could have. We made each other so happy. The months went on and we were still happy and got closer and closer.

He was the private type and never really told anyone his problems or anything. Finally he opened up to me because he realized he could trust me. I knew more about him than anyone. We started discussing depression and our suicidal thoughts. I had suffered from it for many years and then I realized he had been too. He said it was so nice to know that someone else shared his problem. We knew that together we would pull through it because we made each other so happy.

In January Michael went to the doctor to get medicine for his depression and he also started counseling. He was happier than ever and I was so proud of him for getting help. Fighting at home continued and he got upset sometimes, but when he was around me he was always happy. He always let me know how happy he was and that he hoped he made me happy. He told me I saved his life and he knew he still wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for me.

His parents weren’t mean; they just pushed him to do the right thing. Michael wanted to make his own choices and so he fought back with them.

On Saturday March 19th, 2005 Michael came to pick me up for our date. We went to movies, then rode around and talked about things. It was one of the best dates we’d ever had. He kept talking about how happy he was and our future together. Finally it was time for me to go home. We pulled up at my house and ended up sitting in the driveway for over a half hour. We talked about everything. He kept talking about the fighting at home and how he didn’t care anymore (although you could tell that he did). I told him just to try to do what they asked so they wouldn’t fight with each other and then things would be okay. We talked for a while longer and he was already past his curfew so I wanted him to go home. I asked him to please not do anything stupid and he said okay and kissed me goodnight.

The next morning I received a phone call from one of his sisters telling me that he had shot himself. I kept asking if he was okay and she said no Shannon he’s dead. I just couldn’t believe it. Michael and his mother had got into a fight that morning about what clothes she wanted him to wear to church. He fought back with her and finally went into his room and shot himself. He was just too sick to take it anymore. I knew it wasn’t her fault, but I just couldn’t see how something so small could of pushed him that far.

I couldn’t understand why god didn’t save him. I felt like I had nothing left to live for. He was the one that made me happy and the one that kept me going. I had no desire at all to live. I kept wondering how he could do this to me and why he didn’t leave me a note or something. I continued to get worse because I couldn’t eat or drink. Finally I was put into the hospital for dehydration because I had lost 7 pounds in less than two days.

After I was released I spoke with his mother. She told me that when they found him in his room in his other hand was the picture of him and me at Christmas time. I cried so hard, but it brought me so much comfort knowing that he loved and cared about me so much that I was the last thing that he thought about.

The impact this has had on my community is unbelievable. It’s made parents realize to let their children make their own decisions. It’s helped teens get off of drugs. It’s brought my friends close to me and now I truly realize how many people care about me. Without all of this support I know that I wouldn’t still be here.

I want to share this story with everyone in hopes that I can impact others lives. Sometimes you may think no one in the world cares about you, but when something like this happens you realize how many people truly do love you. I know that I must pull through for all the ones that love me, including Michael. He will always have a place in my heart and I know no one can ever replace the way I felt about him, but I know it was his time to go and that god is using this story to help other people and impact their lives.

Please share it with everyone.

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