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The Event

Author: D Anthony, D-Rose Impressions, 04/98

* Excerpt from the motivational and inspirational book,
The Nurse in the Delivery Room Slapped Me... Once *


Recently I watched a movie in which an interesting statement was made. The gist was that there are events that change your life. Nothing is the same afterward. From that point in time every other event is perceived as occurring chronologically before or after the life altering one. I listened quietly and nodded.

My event occurred in January of last year. My event happened when, in a state of utter helplessness, I witnessed my mother taking her last breath. As I write this, tears still fill my eyes as I recall being alone with the most beautiful, giving person I have ever known - silently praying for God to make her better. (I pleaded in spite of the fact that the doctors said her 'system' was shutting down - that there was nothing they could do.) Then realizing she was no longer with me - not in the form that greeted me when I came into this world (as Mahalia Jackson's rendition of 'In The Upper Room (With Jesus)' began to play on her tape recorder). I realized that I would no longer know the feel of her touch, the sound of her laughter at another joke, of her singing a new song, or of her saying she loves me. My Mom was gone.

And from that evening on - nothing was the same. A good portion of the year was spent in various stages of despair, anger, gilt (for not doing more and sooner), disillusionment and isolation. Friends and family continuously invited me to do things with them (i.e. Why don't you get out the house on Mother's Day?). But for me being in this house (where she came to live with me a few months before taking ill) was where I wanted to be - Where I needed to be. I had to experience the pain completely. It was the only way to find answers to at least some of the questions … Why was she taken so soon? Why couldn't she have had a couple years of enjoyment after all the pain in her life? Why couldn't she have taken less care of everyone else and better care of herself? What else could I have done? Where was she? In heaven? Is there a heaven and hell? What is the point of life? Why are we here? What is the rhyme and reason?

Slowly but surely some of my answers became apparent. And I say 'my' answers because I'm not sure that the answers are the same for everyone. (To be honest, I'm not sure of much of anything since that event.) You see as I talked to her friends, and really began to notice the things she held close - I realized that in spite of the pain, my mother was happy. Her friends helped me to see that she was full of laughter, love and faith. And that she was proud of her single most important accomplishment - raising her children. And because of her faith she was strong. Strong in ways that I am only beginning to understand and appreciate.

Along the way, I heard a story about a minister that seems appropriate to recount here. The minister upon hearing that three of his best church members had died in an accident asked - "Lord why? And you took three of my most worthy members. I would have gladly given up some of the others who clearly do not serve your name." The Lord responded they were never yours to give. I took the three because they were ready. I left the others so that you could get them ready.

My Mom was ready. And I'm so grateful for the time I did share with her - and the lessons she taught me.

I have a different perspective on things now. I no longer have the illusions I had about the possession of limitless personal power and intelligence. Reality, along with a dash of humility, sets in quickly as you watch life seep away from someone you truly love. There is only one real force. And any power or intelligence possessed comes through recognition and respect for that force - otherwise known as faith. My Mommy taught me that.

I've come to realize something else since the hardest day of my life. I realize that our purpose is to learn, to love, to laugh, to grow - to try to make the world a little better … every day. And so, from my pain came thank you letters for her friends, which led to inspirational thoughts - which lead to greeting cards, the birth of D-Rose Impressions, art distribution, etc. And when it's all said and done, two objectives supersede all others for succeeding. Via the merchandise and interaction with people like you on D-Rose Impressions Online, I want to positively impact the world in a small way, while I'm here. And second, wherever she is now, and whatever she is doing, I want Rose to look down on me and be proud.

Ironically, the most amazing belief I have come to hold is, during the event, when I asked God to make her better - he answered my prayers.

In closing, I would like you to consider something I wrote for the back of Mom's program …


None of us knows the volume of sand remaining in the hourglass of our lives


Now more than ever she teaches us to appreciate time... Now more than ever she teaches us to appreciate the people we spend it with

Thanks for taking the time to read, to care. And as learning is an interactive process your feedback is welcome. Enjoy the rest of your stay, and until you visit us again - remember to make every day count.




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Your thoughts on 'The Event'

It's truly inspiring. I am so touched.


Yes... Everything except for the death part happened to my mom last January. She was so close to death, we were told she was not going to make it and she was given her last rights... I prayed and prayed and said that she can't go, she is the only one in the world who tells me that she loves me. Then I felt this almost weird supernatural spirit telling me that she will not be taken away... Miraculously she pulled through... I got a second chance with my Mom.


MY mom passed away just 17 days ago, she too was sick and I was with her when Jesus came for her. There is such an emptiness in my soul, but I know without a doubt she is in heaven with the Lord and at such peace. No one can know the hurt unless you have experienced it firsthand. I know that strength from God and time will help get me through. Her name was Debby and she always had a smile that will never be forgotten.


I lost my mom two weeks ago and its been a struggle. I read these words and its been a comfort, thanks for the beautiful words.


Upon losing my mother, the closest person to me, only two weeks ago, I want to say "Thank You" for the beautiful words. The struggle feels never ending.


That's really inspiring... I lost one of my best friends suddenly and am feeling heartbroken. It is true that there are events that change your life. I don't know why this happened, but I just hope that it's for some great reason...


Wow... it sure hit the spot. Thanks.


Yes, it had a great impact and made a real big difference. Thank you.


Simply beautiful!!!!


Wow! Kim G


So true



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